Love invites others to go first

by Craig on November 17, 2010

So this is how I do my loves each day. I’ve got a little pad I’ve printed up. It has all of my loves on it. Each day I rip off a page, and carry it with me everywhere I can. And then I just look for opportunities to follow the directions on said piece of paper. Sometimes I have to reread it a bunch. But it’s a pretty easy plan.

So here’s a real example. I’ve got to be on the laptop – you know – blogging and all. It’s a priority. So I get to work.

Laska the love kitty wants food.

I know this because he’s taking knives and forks out of the dishwasher and setting a place for himself at the table. So do I wait for the meows? Do I write as long as I can before I have to give in? Do I wait for him to start throwing cans of cat food at me? Nope. This is easy. I move the laptop to the side. Put away the forks and knives. Explain to the love kitty, for the umpteenth time, about the bowls on the ground. And feed the love kitty before he asks. He goes first.

Now most of you don’t have to leave the house to practice love. It’s actually in the house where you will have gloriously endless opportunities. But if I stay home, it’s just me and love cat.

So I go shopping. I’ve got a love tucked in my pocket. It’s a clear mission. I make my way to the store and the only challenge is a tie between me and another car at a stop sign. I wave them on. Cake.

Now I stand with my two items, in a line the size of one of those Chinese Dragons in a parade.  But a least I’m near the front end of the dragon. The line moves like it’s in a hurry to get to yesterday.

Yesterday – see what I did there?

Finally I’m second in the line. Then there’s a stirring to my left. And the words, “Next customer can come here!” This irks me a little. I think longingly of tomorrow when I’ll be free to stampede my way over numerous and varied people to get to that other register first.

To the woman behind me I said, “Go ahead.” She has kids, a full cart, and it’s clear that that she’s having a tough day. I know this because one of her kids is sitting on my shoetops. Really. She brightened up like I just handed her round trip tickets to Hawaii – 1st class accommodations, and a free babysitter for the kids while she was on vaca.

“Really?” she said.

“Yeah, sure.” It felt good. I wasn’t so irked anymore. I was a nice person and darned proud of it.

But then there was a card problem with the customer in front of me, meaning he had none. Out to the parking he ran like the wind sauntered. The clerk tapped the glass counter, avoiding eye contact.

The woman behind me. The joyous woman enroute to Hawaii. She waved goodbye on her way out. She said thank you. I smiled and waved back. Then I noticed all the good people who were in line behind both of us were flying out the front door, like happy little Disney bluebirds.

Six seasons changed outside the store window. And one person at a time, people behind me peeled off to the other register – each sure to gain my tacit nod of permission first.

A tumbleweed rolled by.

Then the man rushed moonwalked back in

then there’s a price check,

and the mysterious vacating of the clerk for a few minutes,

and wrapping of the dishes and cups that the person bought

one. by. one.

In newspaper.

Which ran out.

The extra newspaper was not conveniently behind the counter. Which was not convenient at all.

Then there were no more people behind me.

I nodded and smiled. What are ya gonna do.

I watched as the frenzied search for newspaper continued – numerous people involved. It resembled something like squirrels looking for the one last acorn of fall.

There are no more people to wave goodbye to now. And the other register – seeing that there were only two people needing to check out, disappeared like a magic act.

then paper was found.

then the wrapping continued

one. by. one.

and the dishes were wrapped more securely than the baby Jesus


It was my turn. I looked to make sure nobody else was there, just the tumbleweeds, so I stepped up.

So the challenge today. Should you decide to accept it – is that everybody else goes first. Now if you’re a mom – it’s a little unfair – because you are already experts at this game. But for everyone else, this is the day when all the other people in the world have the golden ticket.

It’s just for one day. I hope it’s fun. And tomorrow come back and leave happy little stories of how you saved the world with love.

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Sharon November 17, 2010 at 7:58 am

There is a custom in the Philippines for 20 people to go shopping and ONE stand in line in front of you. As they get to the head of the line, the other 19 with their full carts burst into line in front of you, ’cause they’re all togther right?
Over there if you pick up a case of coke or milk (SEALED) they will OPEN IT AND SCAN EACH ITEM IN THE BOX. Apparently they couldn’t trust the outside of a sealed box, there must be more in the box than what the outside says, or I must have put something else in the box and glued it back together. (and the scan is right on the outside of the box along with how many liters are in the box).
Patience testing, I mean Grocery shopping, over there can be quite an experience.


Craig November 17, 2010 at 10:09 am

Ok – u have to tell me how you know this now – you know that – right? I need the story. Gimme.

And the sun is streaking through my window this morning in a curiously bright way.

Can I just say that seeing the lass’s face in my comment area – seriously – that’s IS sunshine :) – ina the btight way.


Danielle Smith November 17, 2010 at 12:45 pm

You know…. while I appreciate the ‘mommy-exemption’ – I think actually working on putting others first is a good practice for us too – I’m going to work on it today – thank you for the reminder.

And FYI – your site appears beautifully for me :)


Craig November 17, 2010 at 1:40 pm

Danielle – thank you – I’m just exiting from a “my blog is invisible so I am invisible” meltdown. Apparently it doesn’t take long to “become” your blog. And you visiting here and commenting – is affirming and warm and everything that this community I’m entering into is.

I commented to on Sarah Markley’s site today, “I’m a single “never been a mom or dad” guy. And where do I find my blog home. Right there – at the intersection of Moms and Love. There’s my little corner of the internets. The only blogs that touch my heart are the ones in this community. Blogs like yours Sarah. So this is where I make my internet home.

“Hi. My name is Craig. I’m a mommy blogger”.

thank you bazillions


Craig November 17, 2010 at 1:41 pm

and now I’m off to go read you…


Debbie November 17, 2010 at 7:41 pm

Hi Craig! I got to this a little late today, so already blew it! ha! But, I will do it tomorrow, okay? I got here okay, through your comment, but I still don’t know how to subscribe!
Thank you for the fun and the idea to put our love into action!


Craig November 17, 2010 at 10:33 pm

Deb, so happy you came. It’s in the top upper right hand corner that little button that looks like a radar signal – a little tiny square – still haven’t learned how to make it bigger – or move it to a different spot. Keep looking it’s there – I subscribed to myself today just to make sure it worked.


I am His beloved November 17, 2010 at 8:39 pm

Hi my name is Julie and I am late to everything. late to appointments, late to work…my middle name is late and so it seems like the days I am trying to GET some where there are these people who drive slow, and take forever at the cash register and forget their lunch, their shoes ( yes really their shoes)…sigh…and I learn to work on my character flaw and at the same time put others first…
..might I add that I’m late yet again…downloaded firefox just so I could read you…it was worth the wait…


Craig November 17, 2010 at 10:40 pm

Julie, I blame it on my mom. She was always late. See #’s 43,44, and 45 of the about me 100 list :)

You did a lot just to get here and you know I’m thankful I am that you arrived. It’s like a friend sitting across the table for tea. It feels better just having you here. And hey maybe try updating your internet explorer – I’d be interested if that helps.

and having you show up late – THAT – was worth the wait – you are worth waiting for – a nice little shot of evening happy as I write tomorrows post about this mornings’ epic drama :)


Costa Rica February 24, 2013 at 2:33 pm

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