Love seeks the “Why” of the “Do” How’d that work for me?

by Craig on February 10, 2011

On Tuesday I promised that for a whole day I would love like this:

I’d honestly, truly, ask,

and ask,

and ask,

the why’s behind the acts and words of everybody with whom I come in contact.

I thought I’d tell you how that went.

Wow.

I would have missed so much If I just stayed on the surface.

I’m nowhere near where I want to be. I want love to be me!

I have faith, and I can safely say thats me.

I don’t sleep and I can say that is me.

I have a history of mess ups – that’s me alright.

But as much as all of those are me – if I can get the love thing to be me – well – that’s my heart’s desire – and Tuesday’s Love was a baby step toward that.

With my eyes on the lookout, and my heart wanting to understand, this is what I saw:

I saw gratitude on a bright and shining and smiling face that warmed my heart and made me smile. I get that I don’t love in order to get this – but it was nice. I liked it. Sorry.

I saw a person with whom I needed to be very careful with with my words. She was fragile, and if I chose the words wrongly she might have broken – and I didn’t break her. And I think she’s gonna be OK.

I saw a personal cheerleader burst out and encourage me to keep trying, keep writing, keep loving – and let me tell you – That. Felt. Good.

At the beginning of this year of connection, all I felt was the hurt and pain all around me. It obliterated pieces of me. I wrote about that here. And there is so much pain – and I’m feeling so deeply – it often  weighs heavy still.

But when there is joy – that lifts me up.

Many of you told me it would be like that.

Please keep the advice coming.

You guys know stuff!

Anyway. It was a busy day. What else did I see?

I saw a person who made a mistake in their relationship. And I was a good candidate to jump in and help limit the damage. Funny how I just happened to be at the right place at the right time. On this day that I was looking to love – hard – it was probably just chance.

I’m sure that’s all it was.

Really.

Just chance.

Because God never actually intervenes

in the lives of the chosen

and beloved

apples of his eye.

Right?

(smiling)

And so I got to help fix things.

Happy endings.

Yay!

Who doesn’t love happy endings?

Happy endings are like dark chocolate.

And I saw this…

and this is different…

and it’s not a happy ending.

I saw someone who lost a baby before anyone even knew she was pregnant. That cut deep. There will be no funeral. There will be no memorial, But the baby is gone from her womb – and this earth – and even though we both know where the baby is – and the baby is OK – and happy – this is still losing a child. And my heart breaks.

And I saw someone struggling to keep things clean, and fresh, and nice for a family who just dumps stuff everywhere. My mom was right – If we’d have just cleaned up after ourselves her job would have been so much easier. I didn’t get to help here. That just kind of made me sad. But I have a plan – a good plan!

And I caught a mistake someone had made. It was just a little one – an easy one to miss, something few would have noticed. But those few would have responded with daggers.

Happy ending there too.

So that’s it.

It’s kind of amazing what open eyes and a heart that reaches out can do.

No big finish.

I just thought I’d share.

In God’s love

{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }

Michelle February 10, 2011 at 3:46 am

It’s amazing what we see and hear when we are looking and listening with our hearts! :)

Reply

Craig February 10, 2011 at 8:54 am

Amen,. And I think this – that the one whose heart was open ALL THE TIME – what he must have seen, and felt – we, or at least I, never stop to think of the strength that took. God bless you Michelle – and thank you for being here.

Reply

Anonymuss February 10, 2011 at 10:14 am

Even when Jesus was in agony on the cross, He directed someone to care for his earthly mother. He saw her need at a time like that.

Reply

Craig February 10, 2011 at 10:28 am

Yse. He was the only one ever who had eyes wide open and heart receptive EVERY MOMENT of his life. Our example, our Savior, our friend and brother. And even in his last moments – so god A. thanks. God Bless

Reply

Rae February 10, 2011 at 12:40 pm

“I just thought I’d share.” Is perhaps the biggest finish possible. Keep on loving. Someday it will be worth it entirely, even if it only is some of the time now.

Reply

Craig February 10, 2011 at 12:48 pm

Amen Rae – one day everything will be worth it – all the time – perfectly. It’s a broken world now – later fixed. God Bless you – and I heart that you read me today :)

Reply

Mari February 10, 2011 at 5:57 pm

Asking the “why” behind others actions is powerful. For me, it has helped see the story behind others hurtful actions. KEEP ON ASKING!

Reply

Craig February 10, 2011 at 6:14 pm

I will Mari, but not to the extent of this day. I will carry the lessons forward But to ask this deeply to seek this hard – all the time. Not possible. But to strive – yes – that I’ll do. Thank you for reading Mari. God Bless and keep you. And thank you for sharing how asking the why’s has helped you understand. It blessed me.

Reply

Debbie February 11, 2011 at 1:59 am

Thank you for sharing what it was like for you to ask why and look more closely. I have to think that it made a big difference . . .it will make a bigger finish in the end. All those touches of Him through you really impacted me. Praying that I can live like that more and more and more. Feeling like that is really living, when we do that. God bless you and all the ways He moves and leads you!

Reply

Renegades February 11, 2011 at 2:35 pm

Glad that you shared your day.

Reply

Craig February 11, 2011 at 2:49 pm

It was a day of searching – and finding – and being found.

I am so glad to see you here – I still think you are courage with feet. God Bless.

Reply

Leave a Comment

{ 1 trackback }

Previous post:

Next post: