Love has thorns

by Craig on April 12, 2011

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Sleep has been a stranger – this past week. It’s never good but sometimes it is near non-existent. This is when I am forced to realize that being unconscious is not the same thing as sleep. This is one of those bad periods that has my mind reeling and my body feeling all blargh and meh.

What does love do when lack of sleep has the body not thinking straight, feeling sick, and then drags my emotions down?

It just keeps going that’s all.

How did Our Lord keep carrying that cross to Calvary?

He just did.

The Roman soldiers had a job to do and he was slowing them down with his excessive falling. They took the cross from him, maybe even against his protest. Regardless, he just kept marching down the hill of Jerusalem and then up the hill called Calvary.

I love the fact that I have friends who pray for me through this “sleep thing”. Thank you. But as the years go on – the more I realize it’s a thorn – and not to be removed anytime soon – if ever. The more I realize this, the more I just keep going anyway.

Trials seem to be different than thorns.
If it’s a trial it seems meant to be borne and then to pass.
A thorn?
I think a thorn is just to be present.
Passing may not happen.
And love dictates being ok with that.

I am blessed, not for the thorn – but for the God who allows the thorn.

I get how Paul rejoiced in his weakness – his thorn. (2 Cor 12).
I didn’t always get it.
This thorn helps with the “getting” of it.

I’m on the other side of a computer screen. I could just pretend it’s not there and write some generic and fluffy love stuff.

But no masks,
and though sympathy is nice,
Lord knows I love me some good sympathy,
sympathy isn’t asked for.

It’s just a thorn.

You don’t’ get thorns in the side unless you need them, I think. This thorn has a job to do. I’m OK with that.

It’s just that for the past week it’s working a tad hard for my tastes.

You guys know how I’m prone to long series. In fact, trust me, as much as it looks like it, I haven’t forgotten to finish up the series on prayer. But I’m learning that blogging isn’t book writing. It’s life. It moves at the pace of life. It reflects life. And life right now, I think, is being used by Our Lord to teach me something. So it gets the spotlight.

Oh – and did I mention I have to move on Friday? Not really good timing for the body to go haywire. And did I mention that I hurt my arm? It’s a sleep related weakness that just made a muscle go a little snappy. Arms are useful for moving. It’d be nice if that heals before Friday. And did I mention that of the people I would expect to help in the move, it’s possible that none may arrive?

And I just realized how whiny that all sounds. Sorry. I’m a little cranky.

Love is not cranky. I’m gonna work on that.

All things considered, not good timing for the thorn to flare up.

Or maybe…

maybe…

really good timing.

To be continued…

In God’s love

{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }

Dawn April 12, 2011 at 9:51 am

Dear Craig,

I will pray for the arm, the sick feeling, the move and the people to show up for the moving. I will continue to pray about the thorn. What I learned last week through the funeral of my husband’s mother is that you just can’t predict anything. Many times those who showed up to help, brought food, babysat grandkids, drove, organized and hugged were not anyone I would have expected. The “regulars” were the ones needing tended to so what was left? I found out and you will, too.

I hope in your new place they allow cats.

Hugs from here,
Dawn

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 3:23 pm

It’s 320 in the afternoon – and it’s not nearly as bad today as it should be. So somebody must be praying. Bit really – if it makes me more like him – well I pray for that mostly – and the matching faith to back up my big brave words!!(◠‿◠)

We will see how the move turns out – either way – there’s some learning to do this week. The question is not whether they accept Laska – but rather if he will accept them.

God bless you Dawn – and thank you.

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jackie April 12, 2011 at 11:12 am

Prayers for you Craig! I’m beginning to realize that when we escape into the soft and fluffy we leave behind monumental growth and maturing and becoming more like our savior. Also, that it is community, just like Simon who helped Jesus carry his cross, we must have community and support to help us carry our crosses (or bear our thorns).

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 3:27 pm

Thank you Jackie. I heart most the posts I read where the soft and fluffy is not posted in favor of the real. The real gets my heart. That’s why I blog in this community of Christian “mommy bloggers” the heart. Sometimes though I wonder if it’s ok for a man to show that vulnerability – you know us guys – we like to look strong. And in a way – society doesn’t frown upon women who show vulnerability and emotion – sometimes it does with the the men. Anyway – no masks here – I have to be real – or why bother writing. And this is my year I’ve named “connect” – and I’m getting the Simon thing more and more. Thank you. thank you – and God bless.

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A. April 12, 2011 at 12:00 pm

Thorns-drat them but thanks for them for the reasons you gave. I have piggie thorns and I live in a briar patch so my thorns are here for a long haul, too.

I, too, will pray for the needs you have this week, especially. The downside to being a blog friend is that one can’t bring the proverbial pizza on moving day, nor can one actually be there to help, as is the case when proximity or privacy or whatever aren’t issues. Craig, I pray for your week, for your arms and fingers, for your strength, outlook, and spirit. For the logistics and the details. For the people to be there for you. We do need community and sometimes we need them to be ‘brick and mortar’. So I will pray for your brick and mortar people to be there for you . (I know your virtual blogging friends are very helpful and encouraging, too, and I am thankful you have them.) Prayers that Laska stays safe and survives the move, too.

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 3:30 pm

But the good side to being Christians is that no matter how far we are – prayer reaches across the miles. We’ll see about the move – it will be handled regardless – it kind has to be. And Laska – if it’s just me and him he’s gonna be one busy love kitty. (◠‿◠)

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Alida April 12, 2011 at 12:44 pm

Thorns are not the same as trials… I like that. And that the thorn has its job to do… I never thought about it quite that way. Thank you so much for helping me look at my thorn in a whole new way.

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 3:32 pm

I never thought about the thorns being long term – but most scholars think Paul never lost his – almost all in fact. Sometimes Our Lord takes them – sometimes he he allows them to remain – either way – hat the thorn – love the God. That’s the deal. No? Thank you for reading Alida – God bless you and your hubs.

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Nicol April 12, 2011 at 3:38 pm

Hi Craig,
thanks for the “really needed at this time” comment….I was going to offer all kinds of sympathy, but would it be spiritually better if I pushed in the thorn a little? hope you can still laugh and the serotonin is not too low…that happens if I get less than 8 hours of sleep! Yes, it is true! No pity for me. But for real, I suppose that we each have a thorn-It is all about growing into His image right? for Love, because of LOVE.
BTW- My sister and I love the painting with your post…how could we get a copy?
God bless you with some zzzzzzz’s tonight, Nicol

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 3:46 pm

Thank you Nicole – but seriously it doesn’t need any pushing – I am laughing as I write this to you – that is good – that’s helpful – it really is. Thank you ƪ(◠‿◠)╯ And the seratonin it’s low and getting lower – I get that the “lowness” of the feelings is chemical – still no fun though. The last time I got 8 hours of sleep was about 15 years ago. It’s not happening any time soon. It’s just a thorn. And it IS all about growing into the image of God. Amen. Oh – and I love that painting too – if you click where it says “source” it’ll show you where I got it from. It’s a print – and I bet she’d sell it to you. Thank you Nicol – and God Bless you.

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Liz Hoyt Eberle April 12, 2011 at 5:28 pm

Dear Craig. I came here to get ointment for my own thorn and instead I find my friend has a greater need. And guess what??? Love is not seeing the “whine” or hearing the “crankiness.” All of us who are bound together by the stripes on Jesus are standing in the gap for you and holding your arms up. Even across cyberspace.
Holy Father, a bunch of us are gathered together and we ask that You please take care of of our friend, Craig. In Jesus glorious Name. Thank You.

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 5:37 pm

Liz – I am writing this at 5 PM – and the day has been far less bad than it should have – I can only account that to prayer – and only the people who read me know about this. So amen – the prayers are awesome. However the thorn? If and when it’s time God may remove it – or a Dr. will find a way – I’ll wait – and let it do it’s work in the meantime. Thank you Liz – and God bless you.

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Debbie April 12, 2011 at 5:31 pm

Reading and learning about thorns and love here. Thank you , Craig, for sharing about yours in a way for us to understand. I’m not sure if some things in my life are thorns or trials or oppression. Trying to just stay thankful to Him and rejoice always. Praying for you, for help with everything, for His love to come flooding through in this situation. God bless you, Craig and tenderly keep you.

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 5:40 pm

I think a thorn Deb is not a person – and it has positive benefits. Oppression only oppresses. At least that’s my way of looking at it. Of course I never really thought of it until just now – so grain of salt…

Thank you for the prayers Deb – thank you. God bless.

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thefisherlady April 12, 2011 at 7:02 pm

Craig, I love your honesty, your heart opened… so we can know you and ‘Him’ and hold you in prayer… blessings in Jesus

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Craig April 12, 2011 at 7:26 pm

Thank you. Just didn’t want to come across as whiny. This is just a thorn. It’s been there nearly 15 years now – it’s part of my life – I hate it – but it’s done my heart good. I am more like Our Lord because of it – so how can I not be thankful for it – no matter how much I hate it. Thank you for reading. Thank you for your kind words – God Bless you and yours.

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