Sleep has been a stranger – this past week. It’s never good but sometimes it is near non-existent. This is when I am forced to realize that being unconscious is not the same thing as sleep. This is one of those bad periods that has my mind reeling and my body feeling all blargh and meh.
What does love do when lack of sleep has the body not thinking straight, feeling sick, and then drags my emotions down?
It just keeps going that’s all.
How did Our Lord keep carrying that cross to Calvary?
He just did.
The Roman soldiers had a job to do and he was slowing them down with his excessive falling. They took the cross from him, maybe even against his protest. Regardless, he just kept marching down the hill of Jerusalem and then up the hill called Calvary.
I love the fact that I have friends who pray for me through this “sleep thing”. Thank you. But as the years go on – the more I realize it’s a thorn – and not to be removed anytime soon – if ever. The more I realize this, the more I just keep going anyway.
Trials seem to be different than thorns.
If it’s a trial it seems meant to be borne and then to pass.
I think a thorn is just to be present.
Passing may not happen.
And love dictates being ok with that.
I am blessed, not for the thorn – but for the God who allows the thorn.
I get how Paul rejoiced in his weakness – his thorn. (2 Cor 12).
I didn’t always get it.
This thorn helps with the “getting” of it.
I’m on the other side of a computer screen. I could just pretend it’s not there and write some generic and fluffy love stuff.
But no masks,
and though sympathy is nice,
Lord knows I love me some good sympathy,
sympathy isn’t asked for.
It’s just a thorn.
You don’t’ get thorns in the side unless you need them, I think. This thorn has a job to do. I’m OK with that.
It’s just that for the past week it’s working a tad hard for my tastes.
You guys know how I’m prone to long series. In fact, trust me, as much as it looks like it, I haven’t forgotten to finish up the series on prayer. But I’m learning that blogging isn’t book writing. It’s life. It moves at the pace of life. It reflects life. And life right now, I think, is being used by Our Lord to teach me something. So it gets the spotlight.
Oh – and did I mention I have to move on Friday? Not really good timing for the body to go haywire. And did I mention that I hurt my arm? It’s a sleep related weakness that just made a muscle go a little snappy. Arms are useful for moving. It’d be nice if that heals before Friday. And did I mention that of the people I would expect to help in the move, it’s possible that none may arrive?
And I just realized how whiny that all sounds. Sorry. I’m a little cranky.
Love is not cranky. I’m gonna work on that.
All things considered, not good timing for the thorn to flare up.
really good timing.
To be continued…
In God’s love