Love says, “Forgiven, now go…”

by Craig on June 27, 2011

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So many times when Our Lord healed someone he then told them to get up and do something,

… pick up your stretcher, and go home. (MT 9:6)

…Go in peace and be cured… (MK 5:34)

…Go show yourselves to the priests… (LK 17:14)

This Love War against the negative voices that steal so much from us, requires a reliance on prayer, and Our Lord’s forgiveness and healing.

Then when he picks us up after we have fallen we must then…

“go”

I say we – because I fight them too…
and they slay me…
and he heals me…
and I…

like you…

just have to then …

“go”

carry on,

keep moving,

through the successes…

until the next fall.

Our Lord is love and light.

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The inner critical voices are all clouds and shadows.

They will constantly condemn.
They will take away desire to move.
They will never forgive but always accuse.

Anything that is not love – is not God.

The negative voices then?

They. Are. Not God.

I will be on my knees often today,
because just the will to fight the inner critical voices isn’t enough,

will is imperfect…
God is not.

will falters…
God does not.

will fails…
God does not.

I’ll be praying for me – but also for you. If you are fighting in this war against the negative voices I’ll be praying for you!

Because it’s horrible how we listen to our own negative voices,
it’s horrible how we listen to the voices of the minions of the Evil One…

as they both seek to stop us,
and make us feel unworthy,
and make us feel unwanted,
and make us feel undeserving,

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too flawed,
too unlovable,
too unforgivable.

I’m angry at the inner critical voices today.

I was angry at myself yesterday, and as I lay down to sleep, and as sleep didn’t happen, and as the voices snuck into my dream.

Yes, only one dream.

I have written of this and some day I’ll write a full post on it so I don’t keep repeating little bits and pieces.

Today will be a physically miserable day, and the emotions will want to go along with the body.

They will want to go the way of the gray skies and steady drizzle and distant thunder outside my window.

I will be vulnerable to all the inner critical voices.

How do I know this?

It’s because, as I said, I had one dream,
and had it through the night.
It was there when I woke each time,
all 20 or so times,
and it was there when I returned to sleep each time.

It was one dream…
and a million posty notes…
and failure…
and chaos…
and condemnation…
and guilt…

and one posty note…

with one dot in the middle…

just a dot…

and I knew it said…

“forgiven, now go…”

So today I’ll be praying lots…

so today the sleeplessness,
and weakened body,
and the gray outside,
and the voices inside,
will. not. win.

Oh, how I forget too often that prayer is the first line of defense.

So today the war continues,

more posties will be added to the wall…

(If this wall is new to you – please read here – you will heart it I promise.)

and the most important posty added to the wall will be…

and now you know what it means…

“forgiven, now go…”

{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

A. June 27, 2011 at 1:17 pm

Finally back here, Craig (gone again and computer problems) and will read in reverse, but I love this post! What a perfect picture of the girl in the corner! Craig, I will pray for you, too, for victory over the voices. We need them to become whispers, and then mostly nothing, don’t we?

to be alone during thunder storms with voices like that is like having a repeating nightmare, kind of, isn’t it?

And thanks for the prayers. Tonight I meet with one who has been a strong dark voice to me. And I will learn-maybe-about a very painful knife-in-heart giving experience. And I will need-I have to confess-the strength and love and power to overcome the temptation within me to be a negative voice back at THAT voice. I want to be so saturated in His love and in who I am in Him that I don’t even consider or ‘need’ to be a dark voice back. For that, then, I am grateful to you for sharing your dark times here, and for helping us with ours, and for reminding us ,without even specifying it, to pray for you It is part of being in the ‘family’-to pray for one another and to encourage each other while we can.

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Craig June 27, 2011 at 1:25 pm

A., I’m not sure what the negative voices will be when the love war is done – will they be gone? Will they be controlled? Will they be changed? Will they have to deal with a “red thing” and “round thing” – and a short leash?

And the voices? They’re really not scary – because they’re really not voices. I should probably make it clear that I don’t actually hear voices – maybe next post I’ll make that crystal clear. I do not hear voices (◠‿◠). That WOULD be truly scary!

And Amen – united we do stand – divided we will always fall. Divide and conquer is one of the oldest strategies of war – prayer – especially when we are far away from each other as we are in this blogging community – prayer is a necessary way to help each other. God bless you A.

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A. June 27, 2011 at 1:56 pm

That’s true-it’s not that we are hearing voices but that the messages have been stamped onto post its in our brains that we keep ‘reading’.

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Debbie June 27, 2011 at 10:02 pm

I love the “forgiven, now go.” Thank you for sharing that. :) Praying for you, Craig and you, A, along with my own prayers. The war is on . . . And God is on our side. :)
God bless you and keep you today, in His constant care and love!

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A. June 27, 2011 at 10:36 pm

Debbie, thank you for your prayers. Tonight I have peace even though I have been at war this evening, and things did not go well at all-real people with real harsh hard voices. I am feeling the strength building up bit by bit. This thing tonight would have left me feeling much sadder and deflated and defeated in recent times. This makes me want to pray all the more for you and others, then, when I see the layers of strength building bit by bit. Craig, yes, prayers are so necessary! thank you!

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