Love answers the biggest, baddest, negative voice (conclusion)

by Craig on July 26, 2011

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I know it’s the third time in a row I’ve used this picture – but seriously – how absolutely full of awesome is it?

Anyway…

the conclusion of the Conversation with Jesus about the voice that rings so loudly in not only my head, “You aren’t good enough!”

If you missed any part of the conversation, and would like to fill in the details…

Part one is here

and two is here

and three is here.

and four is here.

part five is here.

Remember – the words of Jesus are in red. (◠‿◠)

“Did you ever hear this negative inner voice in regard to your faith?”

“Constantly?”

“What did you do?”

“I kept digging, asking questions, finding answers. I kept talking to you – the one I said I didn’t believe in.”

“Has your faith been ‘good enough’?”

“Apparently – it’s been 26 years since I began to believe – and now I believe more than ever.”

“Now what about the world’s game of ‘success’ – have you been ‘good enough’ there?”

“I am good at certain parts of it, I have failed at most. But the world’s game is kind of absurd anyway. To take a really good look at things from only the world’s perspective – I’m a speck on a blue dot, which is less than a speck in the universe – whatever part of the world’s game I’m ‘good enough’ at, without you, it doesn’t mean a single thing anyway.”

This the picture of Earth taken from beyond Saturn by Voyager in 1990 - a mote of dust suspended on a sunbeam.

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“So if earthly success is not the full reality, what is?”

“That there’s Someone who created all of this…
and there’s a purpose to life…
with or without earthly ‘success’…
and in that fuller reality…
I am good enough…
succeeding in the thing that matters most…
but haven’t given up on earthly dreams…
the ‘earthly’ is reality too, even though the lesser one.”

“One last question.”

“I know what it is.”

“Go ahead then.”

“Do I want your will above my own?”

“Do you?”

“I want what I want – I can’t lie to you. But you know I want what you want above my own will.”

Do you have the positive kernel of truth for your posty note now?

“Yes. In the game of the world I’m not good enough, but nobody is. It’s not the fuller reality anyway. In the true purpose of being I’m also not “good enough” but am, by your Grace. Even then, I wouldn’t have your Grace if I hadn’t chosen rightly. So in that part of life – the eternal part – I am good enough – and I really do want your will above my own.”

“That won’t fit on the posty – better edit.”

(((smile)))

The posty note is part of the Love War against the negative voices that hold us back. The Love War has it’s own category on the side bar. It’s the third one down in the “Lots of Love” section”. This post kinda sums it up.

“OK – editing…

I’m not good enough in the ways of the world, but nobody is – and I won’t give up.

I am ‘good enough’ in the ways of God…
guaranteed because of Grace.

and the higher way is the way better thing to be good enough at…

and Your will not mine.”

“That’s edited?”

“It’s my first edit. I heart lots of words. I’ll finish the editing today.”

(((smile)))

“A good place to stop for the day?”

“Yes.”

“Kernel of truth revealed in the negative voice lie?”

“Yes”

“On to breaking the next horse?”

“Yes.”

Funny, how in the end, someone as wordy as me was reduced to just one word.

 

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Cora July 26, 2011 at 8:56 am

Oh, Craig! I’ve been holding my breath for a few days here. You know, sometimes you know the answers, but until they are spoken in REAL words, you don’t know the answers. Conversations with God are like that. Writing the words down, praying outloud, listening and answering. . . it all brings out those “wordless” emotions and takes us from being a spectator and puts us in the ring, on the mat, wrestling it out with Him. Even then, we know from Jacob, that we are going to walk away with a limp, but we walk away blessed!!! This journey has meant everything to me. I’m limping some, but so thankful that I have learned the process along with you. Thank you!!!!

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Craig July 26, 2011 at 1:50 pm

really, Cora, what can I do but agree with everything you wrote. Although I think we don’t have to walk away with a limp – only if we wrestle – only if we resist – it took me a while to learn that one – and some limping. Thank you, lot’s, for going through this with me – and learning what I’m learning – you’re good company along the road! Thank you!!!!! (one more ! than you had (◠‿◠) )

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Mama Zen July 26, 2011 at 10:12 am

This is such a wonderful post! It truly speaks to me.

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Craig July 26, 2011 at 1:51 pm

Kelli, thank you, your words are like sunlight filtering through trees – awfully gracious – and they make me smile. God bless and keep you!

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Andrea Dawn July 26, 2011 at 12:24 pm

I loved this series of posts! It reminds me of the scripture in Matthew 5 that begins with “Agree with your adversary quickly” . . . there is indeed a kernal of truth in the negative voices we hear, but if we can resist defending ourselves or trying to prove it’s a lie, and face it in the light of God’s love and His word, the “horse” gets broke much faster. Enjoying your journey and rejoicing in every taste of freedom.

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Craig July 26, 2011 at 1:53 pm

That is a brilliant connection with Scripture! Amen! Agree with your adversary quickly. I can’t tell you how full of awesome that is! And I heart – I really heart how much you get the horse breaking analogy. I am so glad to have you here – thank you – thank you lots – and God bless and keep you.

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Michelle July 28, 2011 at 5:51 am

I am so glad I missed a day so that I could read the whole end of the conversation. Just hate hanging on waiting to find out…… :)

I showed my 17yo daughter the photo of earth. Her comment: “We have a sunbeam!” and then “so many people would have looked at it and said, the earth is so tiny ……. but we have a sunbeam!”

Thank you for sharing your chat with our Lord. It spoke so much to me in my situation at the moment (waiting for hubby to have an angiogram next Thurs to see why his heart is appearing to not receive enough blood, and hopefully a simple fix). I also had a girlfriend of great wisdom give me the talking to I needed yesterday. The one I would have given her in the same situation! :)

Our God is so gracious.

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Craig July 30, 2011 at 7:31 am

first, Michelle, I’m sorry for being so late in responding to you. And I do have to tell you that there is a scientific answer that takes a little bit of magic away from the Sunbeam – I won’t tell you unless you want to know – the idea of our planet being suspended on its own Sunbeam is kind of awesome.

And I’m with you – the idea is that the earth is just a little speck of nothing in the vastness that is the universe – and we’re little specks of nothing on it – so all of our striving to be better than this one, or that one, and comparing ourselves one to another – really is a little bit silly. But the one who created the universe – he gives us our significance – because he created IT – just to create us. I’m glad you got a little bit of use out of this conversation with Our Lord. And I’m thankful that your friend was able to give you what you need too. I heart when God’s sends help from different angles, different places, different people. God bless you Michelle.

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A. July 31, 2011 at 10:44 pm

The higher way is the better thing to be good at….thank you for raising and clarifying my focus. I HAVE to transcend-with His help-the low ways.

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