Love is small…

by Craig on September 15, 2011

gitzngirl-Sara Frankle-choose joy-choosejoy-death-dyingsource

I can’t stop thinking about a life…
and death…
and an eternal life…
of someone I’ve never met.

And so I write my heart…

…about Sara.

There was a steady flow of tears last night…
I took Laska the love Kitty for a walk…
his first walk ever in a brisk Autumn wind…
it rained all day…
at sunset there was an open patch of pink in the gray sky…
I didn’t cry during the walk…
or when cleaning my muddy shoes afterwards…
because Laska made me follow him into shoe-top deep mud…
but then the eyes watered and stayed that way until sleep.

And sleep which has been nonexistent for a week – wasn’t too bad. I woke maybe 5 or 6 times in 7 hours – for me that’s good.

And eyes were wet as I fell to sleep…
and I dreamt of a leaking pipe I couldn’t stop…
and buckets collected to catch the water…

gitzngirl-Sara Frankle-choose joy-choosejoy-death-dying-1 cor 13 love

and the pillow this morning was wet…

and a steady flow from each eye has been running since 5AM…

and it’s one in the afternoon now…

and they. just. won’t. stop…

no sobbing…

gitzngirl-Sara Frankle-choose joy-choosejoy-death-dying-1 cor 13 lovesource

just a quiet stream from each eye…

and we never met…
I doubt she ever read a single word of mine…
except by way of comment…

and. my. heart is like lead sinking…

sinking.

And I think of Love.

Sara, or “Gitz”, or “Fritz”, is Love with feet.

She got the name “Gitz” because she laughed as a baby when her dad said “gitchy goo”.

She’s still a baby…

God’s baby.

And what of…

gitzngirl-Sara Frankle-choose joy-choosejoy-death-dying-1 cor 13 lovesource

She wrote in March of this year…

I try to give 100% of myself to people, but I know my 100% isn’t what it used to be… and the fact that no one is keeping track and just loving me anyway? That’s real love. Gracious love. It’s not big and grand and over the top. It’s the daily reminders that we’re in it together.

…If there is something in my home that can be stored away and alphabetized, you can be sure that it is…and am almost giddy when everything lines up perfectly in my drawers…Now that I’m less mobile, however, my organization has suffered…a bit of a mess…and Nicole, bless her, made it even messier so we {she} could make it better.

♥✞ღ

Love. Is. Simple.

Just rearranging cupboards…

lining up labels…

and bowls…

just making the refrigerator clean and happy.

Love is in the little things. Love is helping to make someone’s life more of what they’d like it to be – especially when they can’t do it themselves. Love is so big that it can be a fearsome thing. But it so little too.

Love. Is. So. Little.

It’s not in neon…

it’s not in grand strokes…

it’s in the little pieces…

gitzngirl-Sara Frankle-choose joy-choosejoy-death-dying-1 cor 13 lovesource

So today, please go tell someone…
or better yet…
show them…
that you’re in this together with them.
Nothing over the top…
but give them 100% – even if your 100% is only 50 of what it used to be.

We never met, Sara, but I’m sure we’ll have the opportunity.

Choose joy.

Love hard.

and now I can think of little more than Sara…
and  have only been able to write of her…every post
today I wrote thisand this…of Sarah…and this moment

{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }

Andrea Dawn September 15, 2011 at 10:40 am

“Love is helping to make someone’s life more of what they’d like it to be – especially when they can’t do it themselves. ”

“Choose joy . . . love hard.

Doing this . . . today.

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 5:08 pm

a simple, just simple, thank you. Dawn – just thank you. And God bless you as always.

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kim September 15, 2011 at 11:34 am

Just stumbled over from Jessica’s linky thing. So glad I did. I read your words. I don’t have any to return…just more tears.

I’ll be back for more of those kind of words.

thank you,

Kim

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 7:54 pm

Kim, this week there has been little extra room in my head for any thoughts other than Sara – so I apologize for responding so late to your comment. I’m thankful to Sarah for so many things, and now, for you finding me. And even typing that makes me teary-eyed – and it’s hard to type teary-eyed. But this tear comes with a smile. Thank you for your kind words Kim. I look forward to reading you – when there’s room in my head to read some blogs. Right now…

God bless you Kim – CHOOSE JOY (⌣˛⌣◦) (◠‿◠)

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Cora September 15, 2011 at 11:52 am

Today, Craig, I go out the door to do what you asked. I go with tears. I go with love. For her, for Sara, and for Him. Thank you for sharing your buckets!

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 7:55 pm

Cora, you are a treasure. God bless you my friend.

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A. September 15, 2011 at 12:42 pm

Craig, this stopped me in my tracks. What does this kind of love look like in my life today? I hope to find out. I will do it in honor of Sara, and in gratefulness to Him who supplies this amazing simple love. Thank you for sharing this, Craig. I am sobered.

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 7:56 pm

A. Thank you – I heart knowing you! God bless you A.

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Mari September 15, 2011 at 12:57 pm

Ive often read Sara’s blog and just found out that she was nearing home. Now I popped in here and read your sweet words about her. To give 100% of myself, a challenge she has set for us by her example. I choose joy in this moment!

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thefisherlady September 15, 2011 at 6:33 pm

Craig… I love your tenderness, your hope, your challenge… love, little pieces of love is an amazing thing…you have found a great secret to ‘Christ Living’ … it is all about what we give away; Christ holds your tears, each one, as a treasure to His love.
Blessings friend

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 8:12 pm

I’m sorry, again, I’m so late in replying. But two weeks ago there was a week without near zero sleep. And this last week I’ve been overwhelmed with sadness for Sara Frankl. And as I stand vigil over Sara, from afar, along with so many others, and tears become as natural as breath, I’ve fallen behind, in reading – and commenting – and replying – and I’m sorry, because I heart your comments, and so today, finally, through the sad, powered by hope, and faith, and love, here’s my reply… I heart that you have been so patient with me…

… and Amen Susan, little pieces of love, just construction paper hearts, that’s all we need to do to love – no masterpieces – Just. Simple. Love. God bless you my friend.

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 7:58 pm

Mari, some of us deserve words – some of us deserve sweet words. One of God’s special ones, she deserves sweet words Even her challenge, even her example, is sweet. God bless you Mari, CHOOSE JOY!

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Maria September 15, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Craig, you are so amazing and have such a huge heart. Thanks to this post because it allowed me to find out about Sara’s story. She is so full of faith anf joy, even through her illness. Such an example of keeping the faith no matter what life throws at us.

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 8:04 pm

I’m sorry, again, I’m so late in replying. But two weeks ago there was a week without near zero sleep. And this last week I’ve been overwhelmed with sadness for Sara Frankl. And as I stand vigil over Sara, from afar, along with so many others, and tears become as natural as breath, I’ve fallen behind, in reading – and commenting – and replying – and I’m sorry, because I heart your comments, and so today, finally, through the sad, powered by hope, and faith, and love, here’s my reply… I heart that you have been so patient with me…

…Maria, far from amazing, and a heart that is growing – but thank you. She has fought this for more than a decade – and it is stolen so much physical life – but it seems it could never steal her joy. She’s one of God’s special ones, and it makes me so sad, SO SAD, but she’s going home, she’s going to be with the Father, I should be less sad — oh me of little faith! Maria, thank you for your kind words, they made me smile, smiles are a little hard to come by this week. Thank you for providing one. You also provided some tears – I forgive you for that ツGod bless you and keep you and all of yours Maria.

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Katie September 16, 2011 at 6:19 pm

Your heart is huge and I am sorry it is hurting for a faith friend you had in Sara… even if it was only in reading her blog. What does 100% love look like? I don’t know, but choosing joy and love hard are things I do know. Choosing to let the tears flow is still choosing joy because they speak from the heart as well.

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Craig September 18, 2011 at 8:16 pm

Katie, 100% love is easy to see, it’s only been done by one person, and we all know HIM. Ours is a quest for perfection and grace for the quest ツ and I thank you for your words – choosing sorrow at a time like this – when it’s for her struggle – when it’s for HER – and not me, that’s choosing joy. Sometimes I’m a little selfish with my tears – I need to be less so. Anyway, thank you Katie, and God bless you!

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Katie September 18, 2011 at 10:22 pm

You are so right! Only one person has done 100% love. Thanks for the reminder.

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