Love forgives…remembers…forgets…

by Craig on November 8, 2011

I-trusted-and-was-let-down-again-Love-forgives-remembers-forgets. I found this on a nice Christian blog

And I trusted…
so hard for me to do…
and I was let down…again.

So what now?

Easy…
move on…
no staying rolled up in a ball.

This is part two of this – you’ll heart part one – it’s here.

My negative inner voice cries “Isolate” – but the thing is, now it has a new accompanying voice. That was a handy little love war on the negative voices that I began. Need to finish that up don’t I?

Anyway…

I can’t hear this negative voice anymore without the positive chiming in. I hear “Isolate” but then the new voice that says, “It’s safer to connect.”

I heart that!

So…..

I move on in love…
remembering…
and forgiving…
and forgetting.

I’d say just forgive and forget, but there’s more to love than that. I’ll have to remember this “offense”, only because I need to remember that I’ll have to forgive again. I have to expect that if I lean on people – something so new for me – of course they’ll fail me.

I fail myself.
I fail others.
We fail God.
We’re imperfect.
Only He never fails.

Forgive…
remember…
and forget.

She didn’t intend to cause harm.
She just messed up.
There was no verbal “sorry”…
but she has had a chance to be there again…
and this time she showed up.
So I don’t need the words.

Sometimes we do…
I get that…
but for me, not now.

Love forgives, remembers, and forgets.

I’ll forgive. It’s kind of a weakness of mine. Of all my Christian failings, and there are many, forgiving is not one. I can’t not forgive. Believe me, I’ve tried to hold a grudge before – and it always slips away. I hold onto the angry, and the disappointed, and the hurt for a bit – but forgiveness just kind of happens.

I won’t look the gift horse in the mouth.

I-trusted-and-was-let-down-again-Love-forgives-remembers-forgets. source

It’s a good thing.
I’ll just accept it.

Forgiveness has already happened here.
In the meantime I’ve had a chance to deal with the feelings.
We have to deal with the feelings right?

And you…
if you have a family…

I know you get those same “roll up tight” feelings – but you have dinners to make, and good mornings to say, and maybe teaching to do, and a shared life. You can’t roll up – and so you don’t.

Rolling up can be like a band-aid.
How do you heal without it?

I can’t begin to understand how hard it must me to forgive, remember, and forget when the “offender” is someone under your own roof.  How do you keep the brave face on when one of your babies comes to you and says, “What’s wrong mom?”

You tell them, “Nothing baby.”
Or maybe you share a little more…
“Mommy’s just sad.”

But then if there are any follow-up questions you deflect, “It’s okay, Mommy’s okay. What do you want for lunch?” You don’t have the opportunity to roll up in the little ball. How do you that?!

The love of moms continues to astound me.
You moms – do you even understand how great your love is?

I-trusted-and-was-let-down-again-Love-forgives-remembers-forgets. source

And just in case nobody else has said it…
and because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit…

I will…

Thank you for having so much love.

You make me smile.

You make God smile.

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Victoria Jenkins November 8, 2011 at 10:05 am

I hope we make God smile.
I used to think that it was the oxycontin (sp) the bonding hormone that is secreted right after giving birth that caused a Mom to love like that. But I think I love my grandchildren with even a fiercer love.
I hope we make God smile.

I’m glad you’re a forgiver…but please don’t stuff. It WILL come back and haunt you. (Just in case you would be so inclined,) :)

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Craig November 8, 2011 at 11:12 am

Victoria, the love of a mother ALWAYS makes God smile – I’m sure of it. And I take no credit for being a “forgiver.” It’s just there – I don’t know why. But I’m glad it’s there. Although it sure would be handy to be able to hold the grudge for more than a day or two ツ God bless and keep you Victoria.

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Shanda Oakley November 8, 2011 at 3:44 pm

Oh Criag….this is me! For I have been hurt and only wanted to retreat once again. Yet God has told me to keep loving. and I keep trying. Even though she keeps hurting me.

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Craig November 8, 2011 at 5:33 pm

Shanda, I’m really sorry that your person keeps hurting you – it just doesn’t seem fair. And you keep loving anyway – that’s love – that’s God’s love – God bless you for that. I just finished praying that you would protect the parts of yourself that need protecting – and that He would – while you’re reaching out – and a couple of other things – thank you for the opportunity to pray for you – I heart that! God bless and keep you Shanda.

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Layla Payton November 8, 2011 at 9:33 pm

Craig, this just brings tears.

What a precious post.

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Craig November 10, 2011 at 11:43 am


(◠‿◠)
thank you
God bless you Layla!

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Lisa Maria November 9, 2011 at 6:38 am

So beautiful Craig! From my own perspective… God just wont let me retreat anymore. Its part of my make up.. the new skin He’s given me and his mandate to me…to love and give all. He constantly reminds me that my purpose in life is to love… for His sake and for my sake. Holding on and rolling up means keeping things inside that threaten to burst and when they burst, I’ll burst right along with them.

I used to be in that place of rolling up and withdrawing to keep myself from the pain, but guess what? It didn’t go away, instead it just built up this thing like a plaque around my heart that kept me bitter and resentful. One day.. and I’ll tell you it wasn’t an easy revelation… something cracked those walls and the only thing to keep the dam from swallowing me whole was God’s love and His mandate to give all of myself without reservation. Today, I just cannot do that whole roll up thing anymore.. its not comfortable and when I try its like God says to me “I took you out of this skin and it will never fit you again… you have to keep growing.”

Pride sometimes tries to place me back in that skin, but thank God that He is stronger, bigger and irresistible! Thank God for hearts like yours Craig… hearts that say yes to God over and over again when He commands us to love and forgive. The world may call you a ‘pushover’ but Jesus is smiling and loving on you right now!

God’s Blessings!

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Craig November 10, 2011 at 11:47 am

Lisa Maria – turns out you really must be a long-lost sister (◠‿◠) and what you write about rolling up not taking the pain away – it makes sense – and it’s true. And don’t get me wrong – rolling up is still – and may always be my first response. The difference is that I’m now uncoiling quickly after rolling up – and maybe soon will stop rolling up at all – who knows? Maybe I’ll outgrow the shell – like you did. Thank you Lisa Maria – thank you, and God bless you!

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