Love answers bleak yesterday

by Craig on December 8, 2011

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I’ve got two blogs…
two lights to follow…
Love and Scripture…
the answers to bleak yesterday began with Scripture
and spill over here today in Love.

And now, how does Love answer this…
If you don’t know what this is…
I don’t really want you to know…
But the ugly details are here.

So much new to me this year I named “connect”…
wobbly training wheels…
maybe this was the hammer to remove them.

Love forgives…

No keeping record of this wrong…any wrong…
overlook and learn.

Love believes…

And I said to Our Lord…
The people involved say they know You…
I say I know You.
They’re in control of what they understand or overlook…
But You, if they are Yours, you can move them to right decision…
I know I can ask you to…
and I do.

And it’s not only one comment on one blog, but there are many just like it out there – all will be attending the conference I’m now reluctantly headed to. If I believe You are God, it’s mine to to untangle what I can…

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…God’s to untangle the rest, so I can move forward in confident humility.

Love is patient…

Time flows…
this passes…
everything passes…
everything but One thing.
Be faithful and let the One control the flow of this moment to the next.

Love is kind…

enter into her feelings and emotions…
understand all the hearts involved.
Be delicate, create no more harm.

Love is not proud…

Humility is hard to offend.
Respect her feelings of suspicion, and her friends’ effort to rally round her…
Even though there was nothing to suspect…and I don’t like how her friends responded.

And pray about the loving advice I got…listen to it…even the hard words.

Love is not jealous…

Look at what I have, see what I’ve gained, not what I’ve lost, not what I don’t yet have.
Let who and whose I am define who I am, not hasty, careless words of others…
higher life…higher words…higher love.

Love is not rude…

Again…pour it out…rein it in.
Respond with courtesy.
Know familiarity should take time.
Move forward, not the bull, but the lion.

Love is not self centered…

This is not all about you…
and you don’t stand alone..

Love is not quick to anger…

Choose to rise above gloom and dejection.
Measure the response.
Respond…Learn…Move.

Love does not rejoice in wrongdoing but truth…

Again…pour it out…rein it in.
Direct…Honest…Noble.
Look deeper…without and within.

Love bears all things…

Bend…no breaking.
One brick at a time…
tortoise not hare…
transparent but tempered glass.

Oh how this still cuts deep. Still processing…
I’ll be responding to all of you who were so helpful…
Personally, not publically…except for this…

Thank you.

There was such heartfelt response, private, not in the comments…
I’ll pour over it…take it to heart.

I know you’re all imperfect, as am I…
but it’s the imperfection in a gemstone that yields color and character…

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…and there is grace to cover flaw and provide the facets to catch the light.

You are all…
imperfect and flawed…

gems.

So I think it’s to pray first…
comment to this one again…
say I understand…
briefly mention I was just blogger connecting to blogger…
nothing more…
and if she’s uncomfortable, I respect that…
and I’m sorry my words prompted that…
and not to worry…
and God bless and keep.

And to any others who’s boundaries I may have crossed over…
move forward like lion not bull…
and let God control what I cannot.

Just be me…
continue to pour out…
begin to rein it in.

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Andrea Dawn December 8, 2011 at 10:46 am

Dear Craig . . . From your two posts today it is evident that much of what I had struggled to put on paper found it’s way to you through comments and emails anyway. So thankful that Papa is tending to your heart and giving you eyes to see the bigger picture and from both sides. This too, will work out for good, because you love Him.

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Craig December 8, 2011 at 11:13 am

“Papa” had a lot of help – lots of words from caring people. And everything for me really does come down to these two things – that’s why, although I don’t have enough time to keep up with both blogs, and to continue to read everyone I heart, I can’t let go of either blog – I need my Bible, I need my Love. Andrea Dawn, I just need to keep my heart towards him, and want what He wants, and pray for what HE wants – that’s the thing. Anyway, thank you my friend, and God bless you.

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Katie December 8, 2011 at 1:09 pm

Good thoughts and wonderful how God speaks through others. Community is key to healing and growing with God.

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Craig December 9, 2011 at 8:47 am

Katie – as most of our conversation has been through email – I’ll just say thank you here – and God bless.

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Lisa Maria December 9, 2011 at 1:56 am

Craig, I just caught up on everything. I loved this post and I love how you define and process the way love deals with things like this. I’m glad you have gotten so much support and some ‘balm’ for the wounds. Personally, I do believe that they were very unkind and, if Spirit driven, their response needn’t have been what it was (cattiness is a very appropriate word by the way…don’t be afraid to use it..we women do!) I know I may get some flack for this from other women, but I don’t like Twitter or Facebook because of this same scenario…too much info…to many opportunities for cattiness and gossip and lots of other things I don’t think I ought to be involved in…that’s just me personally.

Whenever I receive a new person commenting on my blog I’m always happy that something I wrote touched someone and I visit their blog to thank them and to see what their place is like. If these people had taken the trouble to do this, they may not have reacted the way that they did, but perhaps this is what their true natures are about…if so, let’s pray for them that God will touch their hearts and teach them more about love. Who knows, He may even use you to do it…I do believe He has a great sense of humour!

God bless and praying that all goes well on your trip.

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Craig December 9, 2011 at 9:04 am

Lisa Maria, I am reminded through the experience of being in this space and writing and commenting here, that being who I am, I can’t really use the same words. For instance, “catty”. Love is sensitive to being in an unusual situation a remembers not to be too familiar before earning the right, especially as a man blogging in a community of women, good, Christian, married women. In this year of blogging, this is not my first reminder that I need to tread carefully – and rightfully so – there are many wolves masquerading as sheep n the internet.

And her friends just rushed to defend her. As did mine.

And I’ll follow what I believe is God’s advice, continue to pour it out, continue to reign it in, and be thankful for people like you who do understand me, and support me. This has been a hurtful reminder, in the middle of a number of challenges recently, I need to keep seeking him, seeing with his eyes, praying, believing, acting with power and love and sound mind, and yes…

I need to pray for these people. I haven’t done that yet. I think they, as did I, had good intentions, and things went wrong. We’re people, we mess up, it’s our thing, we are always in need of forgiveness and grace, they are, and I am. Anyway, thank you my friend. And God bless and keep you.

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Lisa notes December 10, 2011 at 9:06 pm

Oh Craig. I had no idea all this was going on in your world. :-( I am so sorry that you had to feel the cuts that we women can dig. Therein lies the danger of connecting.

But please, please, please don’t turn back (I know you won’t). The joys of connecting always outweigh the pains of it. And there are pains, as you well know. But you have inspired many by your willingness to test these waters and jump in over your head. Your courage and your love have been an example to me to live boldly and love outrageously.

You have been a gift. Please keep giving!

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Craig December 11, 2011 at 9:27 am

Lisa, your words are important for me to hear. Thank you for being so nice. It’s different, women ARE different. I’ve been reminded by a friend that as much of a pedestal as I put Christian moms on – they’re just imperfect – they sin – they make mistakes – Just like me. Although the person I left the comment for –she’s not a mom. I understand more clearly now, because of all the emails I received and advice here – I understand why she might have felt that way. Then she shared her concerns with her friends – her friends rallied around her – I understand. I did the same. My friends just said much kinder things. In this year of connecting – it’s been blessing – and been curse – and it’s been 100 degrees of everything in between. When I began blogging in this community I didn’t consider it a brave thing – but trust me – to continue to blog in this community takes all sorts of bravery. Again, thank you Lisa, thank you much. God bless you.

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A. December 16, 2011 at 12:05 am

Craig, I love what you have written here…especially the part about letting who and whose you are define who you are. You are shining ever more in His likeness. Onward and upward, you are doing it, Craig. This post is such a keeper. (Well, they all are, but this one is because it is born of pain yet contains so much grace, so much mercy, so much truth and Father’s heart.)

A.

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